People have standards because it is a basis of comparison whether with regards to morals, ethics, lifestyle etc. Principle', 'rule', ‘ideal’ and other words that have a positive meaning could be associated with the word ‘standard’. But when it comes to dating and having a relationship, can your standards get in the way? Do you have unrealistic standards in dating?
When it gets in the way
Either subconsciously or consciously, everyone has ideal characteristics for the individuals that we would like to meet. The basis of comparison is known as standards. But with regards to the requirements of individuals we want to date and maybe have a relationship with, this is called dating standards. In order to show these types of standards, here are some examples:
1. Date a person who is financially secure.
2. I would only go out with somebody who is unselfish.
3. Only going out with someone if she/he has a personality that is compatible with mine.
4. I will just go out with someone who is emotionally mature.
This checklist can go on and on but in the meantime, let us focus on the ones mentioned above.
Now, these four standards sound quite realistic, but here’s when you interpret these standards into something totally different:
1. Just going out with someone if she/he earns no less than 6 figures.
2. Go out with a person who always puts me first.
3. Just going out with somebody if she/he has a personality that is compatible with mine according to my checklist.
4. Just going out with someone if he/she is mature mentally and understands me completely.
When you interpret them this way then you probably have unreasonable dating standards.
If you’ve found yourself thinking about the dating standards you have, please, do a truthful evaluation. When it comes to making your dating standards, it's important to be fair and truthful. If you do that, you could simply bring your standards down into a more realistic level. Your viewpoint of things will improve and the odds of finding a companion who would do the same for you will also improve.
Please keep in mind that it's essential to have realistic dating standards, regardless of what they are. Also remember that your dating standards must measure up to you so do a fair and truthful evaluation of yourself. Having standards is not bad, certainly not. As long as your standards aren't unreasonable…that’s fine.