It's vital to have standards because it is used as a basis for judgment - what is right or good and what's wrong or bad. The term standard is synonymous to “rule”, “principal” and “ideal” which all have a more positive connotation. You have to ask yourself - can your standards get in the way of dating and having a relationship? Do you have unrealistic standards in dating?
When it gets in the way
Whether we realize it or not, we have specific characteristics of the kind of people we would like to date and have a romantic relationship with. Standards are used as the basis of judgment. But when it comes to the qualifications of people we would like to date and possibly have a partnership with, this is called dating standards. Please find below a few examples showing these types of dating standards:
1. Just going out with someone if she/he earns a whole lot.
2. I would only go out with somebody who is unselfish.
3. Date an individual if we have compatible personalities.
4. I will just go out with someone who is mentally mature.
This checklist can go on and on but in the meantime, let's talk about the above mentioned.
Now, these four standards sound quite realistic, but here’s when you interpret these standards into something entirely different:
1. Date an individual who earns six figures at least.
2. Go out with a person who always puts me first.
3. Only going out with somebody if he/she has a personality that's compatible with mine according to my list.
4. Just going out with someone if he/she is mature mentally and understands me completely.
We know that these sound absurd, but quite often, we're completely unaware that we interpret our dating standards this way, allowing them to become false dating standards.
What to do
So before making your dating standards, try to be reasonable. With regards to making your dating standards, it's important to be fair and truthful. This way, your dating standards will not be too high. The chances of you finding a companion who will do the same for you would increase as you get a better viewpoint of things.
No matter what standards you might have, just remember that they need to be realistic. It would also help that you do an honest assessment of yourself and find out if those standards were to be measured up to you. It is really not bad to have standards. As long as your standards are not unrealistic…that’s okay.